Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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