either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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