it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
