HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
