Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize