Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
