I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
