just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
