batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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