its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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