i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
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