i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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