Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
my sisters under your porch take her home
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
