so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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