Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
