Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
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the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
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Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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