It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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