I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
