spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Is it because I queefed?
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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