oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
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