Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize