Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize