You made me cry and you don't even care
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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