can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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