Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize
