I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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