This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
