i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
