It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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