i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
