I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Randomize
