I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
