My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
