I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
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