id be glad to
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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