i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
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I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
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You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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