My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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