You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
fuck your aforementioned shoe
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today