i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
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Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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