I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
