It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
