Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
