was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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