There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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