I can text with my tongue
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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