is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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