Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
