I could have mohawked her pubes.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
