i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
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