around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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