The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I lost the right to judge tonight
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Randomize
