Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize